Soulfare Blog

Life Is A Banquet - Eat Up !!!!

Soulfare — Tue, 13 Dec 2011 00:51:25 +0000

There is so much in life to experience, but most people allow life to pass them by. We choose the allow fear, and/or judgement to get in the way.

The life that each of us is living is the only one we have . This is no dress rehearsal and there will be no do overs. So, why do so many people think about a life they want but make no effort to live the life they want? The main reason is fear. Fear that we don’t deserve or can’t achieve the life we want. And, that fear usually get in the way of us stepping out of our routine or comfort zone to go and get what we want.

We each should want our life to be full of a whole lot of wonderful, not full of regrets. And, the only way to achieve that wonderful life that we want is to live each moment to the fullest. Every experience in life should be appreciated even the ones that are uncomfortable, because even being uncomfortable has it’s benefits. Dream your wildest dream and make it happen. You may not succeed the first time, but you will gain experience to help you move forward. It may not be in the exact direction that you wanted to go, but you will definitely move forward. And, there is never a downside to moving forward.

Live and love fearlessly, and know that whatever the outcome it is for your highest good.

Love and blessings in divine order,

Stacye

Song of the day: This Is Your Life - Norman Connors

Who We Are and The Relationships We Need

Soulfare — Wed, 09 Nov 2011 06:15:54 +0000

For every relationship you are in there is always an ending, well not always but some in some cases. When a relationship ends the worst thing you can do for yourself and the next person your are going to be with is to not take that moment in between to clear out the cob webs, get your mind right, and re-evaluate yourself figuring out what you need and want in your life and from a relationship.

The person you were 10 years ago is very different for the person you are now, and for that reason your wants and needs are different, and is probably the reason your past relationship came to an end. The two of you are different people than you were when you met. The one thing that we all seem to forget is that we are all growing and changing every minute of everyday, and what worked for you a few year ago will probably not work for you today.

So, when are relationship of any kind comes to an end you can’t look at it as if something went wrong, because nothing is wrong things are just different. What has happened is that you and the other person have grown apart. One or both of you becomes uncomfortable. There are times when we can ride it out and over look the differences, but in many cases we can’t. And there is nothing wrong with that. We can’t always look at things that don’t work as failure but as an opportunity to learn yourself better. There is no need to feel wronged or let down, but empowered with the knowledge that you have been given to move onto be a better you .

Love and blessing in divine order,

Stacye

The Fairytale & the Facts

Soulfare — Sat, 05 Nov 2011 03:02:54 +0000

This generation is at a great disadvantage. We have grown up in a time where movies and television have romanticize relationships at such a level that we don’t look at relationships realistically, nor do we have realistic expectation of what a relationship should be. I always say they should have a relationship course in high school to help us better understand how to better be in them.

We seem to know that we want companionship and unbeknownst to most of us we need companionship. So we walk through the world only acknowledging our physical needs and desires, and not thinking about our mental and spiritual needs.

Here’s what’s real, Cinderella is a fairytale. There is no such thing happily ever after, but there is day-by-day and minute-by-minute. Relationships are complicated, messy, exciting, beautiful and joyous. But, to succeed they require constant work , the same committed amount of work you had at the beginning of your relationship should remain throughout your relationship.

A relationship should start with two people knowing what they need and want from a relationship.

Do you look at your relationships through the glasses of the Fairytale or do you look at them with the facts as they really are??

Love and blessings in divine order,

Stacye

To Hell and Back

Soulfare — Tue, 27 Sep 2011 02:18:44 +0000

“To Hell and Back”

Today makes the one year anniversary of my last Blog. One year ago I felt broken and lost, and in a place I had never seen before. Since I am a firm believer that it is challenge that brings growth I have to believe that the challenges that I have experienced were for my highest good; for my growth.

I think that over the past few years we have forgotten what okay really means. It means food in our stomachs and a roof over our heads, not what new, newer, bigger thing we think we should have.

I stand today in gratitude for the lessons I have learned and with the knowledge that I will always be okay, but most of all “God’s got me”.

Love and blessings in divine order,

Stacye

Song of the day: “Just When” - Vicki Winans

Don't Hide Love

Soulfare — Thu, 18 Nov 2010 04:41:34 +0000

I always find it sad when we run from, deny, or hide the one thing that we all want the most - to love and to be loved. We make fun of people when they want to spend time with, talk to, or talk about their someone special, and in many cases our fear of expressing our feeling is so strong we would rather lose someone then let them know how much they mean to us.

If love is the one thing that we all desire and hopefully will experience then my question would be why do we make fun of something so serious, fragile and sacred?

Love is all the adjectives you can find. Love can be the most amazing healing gift that someone can give to you, and in the blink of an eye it can be the most painful feeling you have ever experienced. But, at the end of the day Love is Love. Regardless of where it comes from it is something that you cannot live without.

Love is nothing to be afraid of. If you respect it, and nurture it love can be all the amazing things that you want it to be. But, when you treat it with disrespect then that is when it becomes the heartbreak that you fear. There are two things to remember 1) that everything must change and how you or your partner feel today you may not feel tomorrow and 2) even if the relationship ends remember that love doesn’t end it is just that the relationship is over.

So, go on out and love with your whole heart and don’t fear what hasn’t happened or being made a fool. I don’t know about you but I would rather be made a fool, then live a life without love.

Love and blessings in divine order,

Stacye

The Fear of Falling

Soulfare — Thu, 04 Nov 2010 02:10:10 +0000

Fear of Falling

In each life there is the moment when we seem overwhelmed and fear what our life has become or might be becoming, but most of all we fear more what others will think of us.

If the people in your life that you love can’t love you in what feels like your low moments then those are not people you don’t need in your life. We all have low moments and we should never be embarrassed by our feelings. True you can’t talk to everybody about everything, but it doesn’t mean that you should hide who you are and what you’re gong through.

You should never feel bad about feeling bad. You are allowed to feel anyway that you want to feel. No one can be strong all of the time. You never know who might have gone through or is going through what you’re experiencing, and you might be able to help each other.

There has to be some lows in life for us to grow , and for us to appreciate the highs, and true friends love without judgment or expectations.

Are you excepting and working with the changes in your life or are you fighting them?

Love and blessings

Stacye

Class Is In Session

Soulfare — Wed, 20 Oct 2010 22:33:59 +0000

In every life there is a time when you feel overwhelmed. You feel as though you can’t go on. All because things aren’t going the way you think they should go. The thing is they may not be going the way you would like them to, but they are going the way that they should.

Recently I was in a funk. Nothing seemed to be going in a positive direction and it was getting to me. Not that I didn’t already know that everything happens for a reason, but for once that wasn’t making it any easier. Then as time went on all that seemed challenging seemed to make sense to me, and I saw myself grateful for the challenges because I knew without them I could not have learned the things I did and I couldn’t have grown. It was with that clarity that I was able to lift myself up out of my funk. I can look back on the challenges and laugh, but in the thick of it the weight was almost unbearable.

Right now it seems that everyone is going through a challenging time whether it is financial or emotional or both and challenges of any kind can take a toll on your spirit. It is important to remember that this to shall pass, and that whatever is going on in your life is just and experience. It isn’t who you are or how your life is going to stay unless you claim it, and start believing that this new and challenging situation is what your life is has to be.

So, take the lesson and claim it as a blessing. It is a wonderful life lesson to remind you how strong, smart and talented you are. You have now gained more experience and tools to make you even more effective in you work, and in your relationships.

Things are not bad, you are just having a life growth class.

Love and blessings in divine order ,

Stacye

The Love Drug

Soulfare — Thu, 12 Aug 2010 05:27:26 +0000

In every persons life there is the one that we can never get out of our system. The one that we will always remember. The one that we will always love. The one that you can’t seem to live with, but can’t seem to do without. The drug of love.

We never think of passion or love as drugs, but they can be. Passion is an amazing thing that burns thru you and in most cases clouds your judgment. There is the high, we find someone that makes us feel like we have never felt before, that makes us feel desirable, loved and alive, but at the same time this person can make us feel the complete opposite. We know in our heart that there is something missing in the relationship but we can’t seem to let go of the drug because we are afraid that we will never find that high again with anyone else.

The hard part in any relationship is knowing who you are, what you want and what you need, and unfortunately we can get so caught up in the heat of a relationship that we lose ourselves just like a drug addict.

It’s great if the person you are in a relationship is what you want and need as well as your drug of choice, but if your in a relationship doesn’t fulfill your needs and doesn’t make you feel good at least 60% of the time then you have to realize that you may never have the kind of relationship that you desire until you make room for if. The fear of loneliness and not find that heat again can make us stick it out longer that than we should. But, the truth is you can’t have something new if your closet/life is cluttered, and no matter how hard we try we can never make someone be what we what we want them to be, they can only be who they are.

Love is a beautiful thing when you are with the right person. It is a beautiful thing when you know what you want and need and it comes in the perfect package, and even more so when you believe that it is not only possible but what you deserve in your life.

Love is Love

Soulfare — Thu, 22 Jul 2010 01:42:33 +0000

So many times I hear people saying they don’t love someone anymore, but the reality is that love lives forever, it’s only the relationship that has ended.

I think that it’s unfair to require a definition on our feelings toward our past relationships just because we are no longer with them. Friends and family alike and even sometimes the new relationship want to hear us say that we not only don’t love our former lover but we hate them. And, I have to ask why?

Why is it necessary to reduce a relationship to nothing, as though the relationship never made you happy or never meant anything to you nor can it ever again mean anything to you?

Nothing is meant to last forever, and for that reason it’s important to remember that our relationships are part of our journey and growth. Yes, sometime relationships hurt, and sometimes there is much invested a home and children, but if there hadn’t been some joy you wouldn’t have been there. People change, grow and sometimes grow apart. Just because you no longer want to be with someone or they no longer want to be with you it’s no reason to harbor resentment. You appreciate what you got out of the relationship and move on.

I always like to believe that I got whatever I was supposed to get from the relationship/experience and that the Universe has made way for new relationship/experience, and I take what I’ve learned to hopefully do better and be better in the future. Yes, things have happened to me that have hurt my feelings, but those things don’t change the love I have they just help me to better understand who I’m dealing with, and the things I do and don’t want in my life

Yes, there is a difference between loving someone, and being in love with someone, but at the end of the day if you love, then you love.
And, really loving someone means wanting the best for them and their happiness even if that means them not being with you.

Is your Love , Love ?

Making Room For Happiness

Soulfare — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 21:39:31 +0000

Happiness seems sometimes eluding but the truth is that sometimes we have to make room for it. In life there are always going to be up’s and down’s and sometimes the down’s seem lingering, but that means it is time to clean the closet of our life.

As we go through life we often realize how much stuff we are collecting. Not just material things but people, and emotions. Now most of us are aware of the fact that we need to let go and clean our physical closets, homes garages, but very few of us ever think about or take the time clean our emotional closet. And, in that search for happiness we don’t realize that we can’t seem to achieve happiness because we are allowing our past experiences, hurts and sometimes people to get in the way of our present and future happiness. Sometimes just continuing to live our lives without taking a moment to acknowledge what we have been through so that we can move forward.

Happiness can be found in the smallest and simplest things, but when your emotional closet is full or overrun with negative things and people how can you find appreciation for those good people and things? How can you find joy, or happiness in a closet full of clutter??

We all have so much going on, but it is important to make time even if it is only five minutes a day to check in with ourselves and let go of some of those unwanted and many times negative feelings that fill our emotional closet and get in the way of our happiness.

Happiness isn’t hiding from you it is just waiting for some room so it can come in.

Are you making room for the happiness you seek or are you holding on to the clutter that prevents happiness from coming into your life?

Love and blessings in divine order,

Stacye